Monday, June 13

Body Disposal in 1000 Easy Steps

Since I am not sleeping, Shady has been badgering me about Tzamain's body. Believe me the little comment she left on the previous post is mild compared to the suggestions she's been making. I'm so tired I want to cry, and then she makes insane suggestions of burning the body or giant blenders? Gah For the first, we don't have access to enough wood to reduce the body to ash and the smell would probably attract attention. The second I won't dignify with a response.

There are couple problems with getting rid of the body and only some of them are solvable. Yes, Shady is right... it could attract animals, and the longer it's up there, the more it will smell. I've smelled rotting meat before in an apartment we moved into when I was kid- meat (purposefully?) left in a fridge by previous tenants. It will only get worse the longer it putrefies.


Got an old blanket from one of the plastic tubs I brought with me and spread it outside next to the house and under one of the holes on the 2nd floor. Then I had Shady take Sunshine upstairs and push the body out. It landed a little farther off the blanket than I expected, thanks to Sunshine apparently making a game of it, but I managed to roll it over to the center and wrap it.

Shady and Sunshine appeared a few minutes later. Sunshine was chewing on something with fresh gore on his face and hands, and I just did NOT want to know. After much cajoling from Shady, Sunshine grabbed the corner of the blanket and dragged the body to my car, with Shady and I trailing along behind him to make sure "nothing fell out." Say what you will about him, he's smarter than he seems. He knew exactly what to do when we got to the car and picked up the body without being told, shoving it inside. The sounds of the bones breaking as one of the legs got turned the wrong way still makes me retch now that I am home.

I had to go alone because Sunshine couldn't be left at the house alone for fear he might wander off or have a misunderstanding with Ron. All last night, whenever I happened to look up and see Ron back in the room, he was glaring at Sunshine almost resentfully. I have no idea what's going on there, but it's going to stop before it goes any further.

So basically, broken 'bear mauled' body in the back seat and out of state plates made me one paranoid driver. I stuck to the back roads and when I finally found a ditch with some water moving through it to somewhere, I dragged and shoved the body to the edge of the road, praying that no one would happen along and alert the police, and tipped the body from the blanket and into the ditch.

I didn't want to keep the blanket, but I've watched too many episodes of CSI to leave my own property on a corpse. Not that he couldn't have picked up "transfer" from the blanket or something. I drove around on some more back roads before abandoning the blanket as soon as I figured I was far enough away from the body and drove home.

And yes, for all concerned parties. I AM crashing now, and if there are typos, though it goes against my grain, they can just stay. I don't even care.


  1. Willkommen auf Ihrer unendlichen Alptraum Mystery.

  2. My "infinite nightmare" is body removal while dead on my feet? You Vindicate people have a peculiar sense of humor. Why don't you come get rid of your former colleague's body and save me some effort. I don't appreciate having to defend my family from you or having to dispose of your garbage.